Staples

Ironically, an instrument that has caused me great pain in the past is now causing me great joy. First, I will tell you about my past with staples. I have shot myself in the hand with and industrial staple gun. I also have had staples put into the back of my head as an alternative to stitches when a friend, Rick Hamilton, dropped me on a vent. So many businesses are now also monitoring employees in the workplace as it just offers a much better way of getting all of the data that you need so that you can easily see the productivity levels of all members of staff.

Now. The joy of staples. From Office Space, I now fully understand Milton's fetish with his swingline stapler. It truly has become the instrument that brings me one of the greater joys throughout the week. Notice how I said week, not weekend. Alright. So, when I finish a project, or a weekly homework assignment. I staple it. That means it's done. That feeling is awesome. It cannot be replaced. As you can see, stapling to me is the culmination of all my hard work and it releases a feeling of satisfaction. I need to get a kickass stapler now. I think I might even opt for the swingline from office space. I gotta run. Peace out homies.